What an exciting day. I'm at the Hollywood location of the co-working space where I have a membership. I normally go to the Venice branch, so this is my first time here. I'm immediately infused with good energy from this elevated space and I am grateful to be here.
I started my morning with a facial in preparation for Thursday's show. I was reluctant to tell my esthetician that I have started taking Accutane for, like, the sixth time in my life. We had hoped to find natural alternative remedies, but nothing really works as well as that spiffy little pharmaceutical, and with everyone going on, I can't afford any breakouts right now.
Getting videos of these next few performances is hugely important because we can leverage the footage to book more gigs in the future. Ergo, I need to look my best. I'd like to pretend I'm totally confident, and when I'm on stage, I will. But the truth is, I'm still working on my relationship with self-image, especially when it comes to seeing myself in photos and videos.
I want to be completely in the zone on Thursday, imagining that I am on my dream set––The Jimmy Kimmel Show. Despite whatever is going on in front of me, I want to give a performance with that kind of focus and intensity.
I'm finding that one of the most challenging parts of performance is looking people in the eye while singing to them. We've performed at a few small venues for audiences of ten or so people, and I've experienced a handful of those awkward moments, but I'm getting better at handling them. The key is to just have fun with it.
I gotta say, this daily writing commitment has been so helpful for my overall growth, which will undoubtedly enhance my performance abilities. It feels empowering to put myself out there and own how I feel, which allows me to discover themes of who I truly am.
I don't know if I'll ever stop feeling awkward in certain social situations, but hopefully this practice will create a grounded foundation of the person I want to be so that I can project that energy into the world.
On that note, I have a lot of work to do the next few hours here at "the office," mostly related to show promotion and fundraising for upcoming projects, so I'd better hop to it.
Ttyt,
Hannah